Friday, June 15, 2007

What Was Going Through My Head While I Typed

I want to learn some more random skills. So I'm giving myself calligraphy lessons. I bought a book that walks me through it and a fancy complicated set of dip-pen nibs. There are several different widths of nibs and I fit them into the pen and slip a resevoir over it then use a brush to apply the ink to my nib; I've been doing alphabet exercises in Roman and Italic hand. I've been watercoloring alot too. I'm sitting with my laptop in the small clear area in the middle of my messy bedroom floor. Surrounding me are: watercolor set, my designated paint brush clensing coffee mug, some tubes of acrylic paint, sidewalk chalk (i used that on a earth picture), markers, crayons, colored pencils, sketching pencils and charcoal, calligraphy nibs, calligraphy dip inks, lots of paper, hobby lobby scrapbook paper, book about calligraphy, book about sketching, book about watercoloring, and here's my coffee mug. I've been listening to Shakespeare's Othello on tape while I do these things. I ordered my textbooks for England off They include 4 Shakespeare plays and le Morte Darthur and the Idylls of a King (books about King Arthur). Ya'll I am so excited about this trip. I'm excited about the classes and heck I'm freaking attending Cambridge University! I'm ecstatic! I was writing about this in my lovely journal with butterflies on it yesterday. I spent 3 hours in starbucks yesterday. I was in the best mood; it was like my chest was going to just burst with joy and I felt a freedom that I don't feel all that often. I guess a good word for it would be "passionate." I have felt pretty passionate alltogether lately. The Barista came around for a free tea tasting! He had a British refreshing tea with some sort of mint, a red African spicy tea, and something from Yemen that tasted like medicine. He gave me a whole refresh cup for free. Here's the random rext message I sent to Blake, "I'm in starbucks, midafternoon, it's raining outside and the sun is out. I'm drinking "refresh" tea with honey in it and listening to mello music. I am incredible happy today." This trip is exactly what I need at exactly the right time. I was talking to Nick Thorn about this. (He just got back from 5 months in St. Louis.) I want to go be somewhere totally different just by myself for a while. AND fortunately enought, in 20-something days I will be in a place I have never been, in a different culture (while not as dramatically different as wayne in india- but that is not what i'm looking for), more alone than I have ever been for a long enough time to have to get used to it. I think I'll just bloom there! This I didn't think of yesterday. This I thought of the night before- yes in starbucks by the big window viewing the street and it was pouring rain in sheets and the street lights had halos and the room was just full of life; the colors just looked more vibrant than normal and the dimensions just looked deeper and the music sounded so clear and the tracks were perfect with the mood and everybody was talking chatty. I wished I had a sweater on- not because I was cold but just becase it put me in the mood for a sweater. I want to be proposed to in the rain. But I'm not much into romance lately. My mind is everywhere else right now and I like it. I'm sure I will think about those things some other time and at that time, well it will be time for it but that is just not now.
I want knowledge. Usually I am all about book learning- little facts and theories, but I want to learn more about skills and such. crafts and music and food and cultures and God- I'm a different kind of curious lately than I usually am and I really like it. I've been experimenting alot with food lately. Not so much actually cooking other than eggs but like creative sandwiches and salads. I feel really healthy too. Today my lunch was this: Spinach, tomato wedge, avacado, cut-up string cheese, almonds, and chips of bacon. I'm tired of creamy ranch so i mixed some basil and olive oil and poured that on it. And palmagranite (spell?) juice. I've been doing coffee experiments too. Today I wore a skirt and an ankle bracelot with bells on it. I felt pretty snazzy. I dont think I am a fashion fiend but I have my own style and I enjoy playing with that. Sometimes I get pretty disgusted at myself and how much I care about clothes, but it is still true that when I am wearing a particularly creative outfit, I feel pretty all day. I like being told I'm pretty. I wish I could follow that with something deep about women and self-esteem but I think I'm tired. Yes. Goodnight.

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