Friday, November 29, 2013

As women, inside us is this longing-

 -An insatiable need for validation, adoration, affirmation, affection, and devotion.  And we are like, "Where is this coming from?"  And where should we channel it?  After we find comfort in the realization that we are not alone in our deep quiet longings, should we suppress them?  Should we alter expectations of our husbands?  If unmarried, should we seek men who may satisfy these?  Should we kindle deeper friendships?  Or should we consider that there may be an entirely different source altogether? 

I long to feel adored, beautiful and treasured.  It is good and right for my husband to be sensitive to those needs- he was created with the desire to treasure someone after all.  God created both men and women in his own image.  As God placed in us His own desire to be loved, sought after, and cherished, He placed in men His own desire to be relied upon and affirmed by the words of the one he cherishes.  The puzzle pieces fit perfectly, actually. 

God intentionally placed in men and women an even greater need for Himself.  No person was intended to provide these needs anymore than we were meant to be fulfilled by their attempts.  Therefore we should neither burden them with impossible expectations nor set ourselves up for disappointment.  Christy Nockels suggests, "By posturing our hearts to look to God to meet the God-needs and acknowledging that He alone can meet them, we've positioned ourselves for the next posture: fulfillment."   Our security, validation, self-worth and identity should not be rooted in men's compliments or lack thereof (or anything else for that matter), but in the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding. 

Proverbs 13:12 says, Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.  Many women are heartsick from deferred hopes of relationship or of fulfillment within relationships; but if we let God provide the God-needs, we will feel like a flourishing tree, lovely and fruitful Jeremiah 17:7-8.  

Chris and I plan to complete a Study-Discussion-Decision Emersion over Christmas break.  One week is dedicated to distinguishing God-needs and Spouse-needs in our lives and in our marriage.  I will likely post the exercises soon.  

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

We are moving and I feel...

Coffee and watching petals fall with morning rain from courtyard tree.
Sound, comforting.
Site, lovely.
Sentiment, sad but hopeful.

In a few hours, our tree will no longer be full of bright blooms.  While I am sad to see the change, I have hope because that tree will not be bare.  It will turn a new and vibrant green. These last months, as we prepare to leave our dear friends here, God has given peace and comfort much like this sweet petal-tugging rain.  We have hope that our transition will lead us to a life no less beautiful than that we are leaving, just different.

Our three years here have been like a springtime in our lives.  God has taught us new and wonderful things about community, redemption, and justice.  So, I believe that God gave us this period of growth as a springboard for what is to come.  I am thankful and will always remember our beautiful time in New Jersey. 

Friday, February 8, 2013


I made a list of words that I love. I'm going to hang it on my cabinet to inspire me in the mornings- to motivate me to juice some veggies, do some yoga and spend some quiet time with the Lord. 

Saturday, January 12, 2013

Musical movies and shows and prose.

This week I saw the film rendition of one of my favorite musical plays and the musical play rendition of one of my favorite movies.

Les Miserables and Once

Christopher surprised me by taking me to see Once for my birthday yesterday!   Standing room tickets are only $27.00 and I highly recommend them.  The show is like an awesome Irish concert + drama and the story is so real and raw and good.  The characters are genuine; the ending counter-cultural or at least counter-Hollywood.

As for Les Miserables, I cried 5x.  The film is beautiful and deep and naked, undoubtedly one of the greatest stories ever written.  It speaks of injustices that are still prevalent today and teaches a lot about humility, love and grace.  I want to read the book!